Outside the Box Life is pretty boring and dull when you stay in the box. The sunlight can’t come in, and it’s dark and lonely. So what keeps you there? Fear? Of what, the opinions of others? You know they only matter if you want them to! That you won’t measure up? You know, deep down in your heart, that you are fully equipped to make your life whatever you want it to be. So what’s your next step? Okay, you can stay in the box, where one day is exactly like the one before. It’s safe, but it’s not fun or interesting or joyful. In fact, it’s boring. There’s no view, no friends to keep you company, no one to laugh with. You can become numb with boredom and complacency. This is not life! This is not joy! This is not YOU!
By DEBORAH AILMAN
So you start to think to yourself, “What would life be like outside the box? What does the world look like beyond these four gray walls that I’ve encased myself in?” So you muster up a little courage and you move the cover slightly off the box. A light streams in. Sure, it’s just a tiny little wave of a light, but it seems to call you, “Come on out, see what’s here.” So you slide the lid a little more and peer out. The world outside the box is alive with color! There are greens and blues and RAINBOWS everywhere! Big pink fluffy clouds float silently by playing hide-and-seek with the sun’s rays. People sit on park benches while squirrels play at their feet and the green grass seems to stretch on forever. There is joy here. There is love here. There is positive expectation here. These people aren’t worried about being safe because they are so consumed with living! They see the value in themselves and each other. They approach every day expecting the best and they get it! You start to think to yourself “I could like it here... I do like it here!” His father always treated him badly while he doted on his
other two children. Tim, eleven, and Diane, nine always got the latest toys and
the nicest clothes. And his father always gave them plenty of pocket money to
boot. Brian had to shop at Goodwill with some of the money he earned at the
store. The rest of it his father kept. “Earn your keep,” the old man would
always say. Brian’s mother never stood up for him. Though she secretly
thought her husband was a bastard her life with him was cozy. In 1940’s Queens,
New York she lived very well. She had a new mink coat and a brand new Ford.
There was nothing her husband wouldn’t do for her or the younger children. She
reasoned that Brian was getting older and soon he’d be out on his own. If she
only really knew (or cared) about all the pain her son was feeling maybe things
would have been different. But she didn’t know Brian cried himself to sleep
almost every night. When he was seventeen, Brian enlisted in the Army. It was
one way to get away from his father who didn’t even look up from the evening
paper to say goodbye. “Screw you,” Brian thought silently to himself as he
flipped his duffel bag over his shoulder and walked out the door. But Brian was still a loner. Because he always had an
after school job and plenty of chores, he never had time to make many friends.
And even when he brought a friend home, Brian was embarrassed to see that his
father treated the friend just as badly as he treated Brian. “What’s wrong with
your father?” was a question Brian heard too many times. Maria DeVito almost slipped on the ice hurrying to work. She
was late again. It was the third time this week, but it was difficult for her
to work AND take care of her elderly mother. Rose was almost seventy and
senile. Maria always worried that she would come home to find the house burned
down or her mother tripping down the stairs. “You’re late again,” her boss said. Maria explained about
her mother. “Put her in a home,” he replied. Maria stared at her boss, Brian
Lasser. She thought he was the devil incarnate. But he wasn’t born a monster,
he was raised to be one . . . . .
But before you join the group of people lively waving at you to join them, you do one more thing; you kick the box somewhere where it will never be seen or used again.
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TRAPPED AN EXCERPT FROM A NEW NOVEL BY DEBORAH AILMAN
Brain Lasser was invisible. At least he felt that way. He
bundled his coat around him as he left the supermarket where he bagged
groceries every day after school. And all day on Saturdays. He was only
fourteen years old but that made no difference to his tyrannical father who
insisted the boy work although they certainly didn’t need the money. “It’ll
make a man out of you,” his father always said. Brian hadn’t even had a chance
to be a boy.
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DUCT TAPE
By Deborah Ailman
The other day one of my cats swung open the cabinet under the kitchen sink and
broke the door. It hung haphazardly off the broken hinge. When my husband got home from work, he moved the garbage pail from the damaged cabinet to the one right next to it. Because he had no time to get a new hinge at the local hardware store, he duct taped the broken door shut so prying little paws couldn’t get into trouble.
For the rest of the night, every time I threw something away I reached for the broken door, only the tape prevented me from opening the damaged door. But I kept trying anyway, on a kind of autopilot.
It was then that I realized that our bad habits are like that broken door and the Law of Attraction is like the duct tape; when we follow it, it prevents us from entering that broken door, or, to put it simply it helps us develop healthy new habits and discard those which hold us back in life.
When we see the duct tape we go in a different direction, one that takes us on the “unbroken path.” If the duct tape wasn’t in place, we would continue to open the broken door; we would be getting the same results we always got and we would not be on the road to making our lives the way we want them to be. But we need to concentrate and understand that when we trust the Law of Attraction it will always open the right door for us: The road to prosperity and peace and understanding. The road to happiness.
Think of the Law of Attraction like that duct tape pointing us to the right door. The one that opens up on our dreams.
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Like it or Not, the Law of Attraction Is Real
By Deborah Ailman
It amazes
me how many people think that the Law of Attraction is all a bunch of “fluff”
They think it is “pie in the sky” thinking and has no sure footing in the real
world. Nothing could be further from the truth. The Law of
Attraction is real, and for those that learn to use it correctly it can bring a
life of fulfillment and joy. But the first steps are not easy. I liken it to a
toddler taking his/her first steps. Unsure and wobbly, the baby takes its first
steps and more often than not, ends up on its rear end. But when
you try and try again, you get more polished; more experienced. You fall less
and less, until your gait is strong and sure. You have to concentrate when you
take those first steps, but once you get going it becomes second nature to you,
and you probably don’t even remember a time when you couldn’t walk. And so it
is with practicing the Law of Attraction. At first it is hard to keep those
negative thoughts at bay, and to replace them with their positive counterparts.
But when you practice over and over it suddenly feels like the sun has broken
free from a cloudy sky. You can see the end of your rainbow and it has all your
dreams coming true because you believe they will. You have set the stage in
your mind for victory, and you have come to claim the prize. See
yourself succeeding. See the easy way things line up for you with no effort,
and just because you know they will. Life takes on a distinctive, happy tone
that just wasn’t there before. Once you changed your thoughts your life began
to change. Truly
believe that you deserve success and to be happy because it is absolutely so! So remember
this next time you get into a funk and turn it around, because you can! The
power is right inside your mind, just waiting to be tapped. So turn that mental
faucet on!
Go Put Your Shoes On!
By Deborah Ailman
Some very wise people have said that success is yours if you just take
the first step.
So what’s holding you back? Go
put your shoes on!
Yes it really is that easy, but we tend to have “issues” when it comes to our own success and happiness. And probably the number one issue is that we feel we don’t deserve the things we want in life.
I was brought up in Queens, New York, a child of the disco era. I had a strict Italian Catholic upbringing. I was taught never to ask for things and to be happy with whatever I got. Taught never to complain; never to speak up even if I were genuinely wronged. Rights belonged to other people, but not to me.
This is absolutely wrong. Of course, you don’t want a whiney kid who complains about everything just to be the center of attention, but children have rights too and they should be taught the correct way to assert themselves. They should be taught to value themselves. I was taught to value others, but not myself. I walked around on “eggshells” praying I didn’t say or do the wrong thing. There was zero tolerance for me in our house. Mistakes were just not allowed.
But we all make mistakes, so I always had to hide mine.
Which brings me back to my original point. If you’re raised this way then it’s a sure bet you’re having trouble with the concept that you deserve success and to have the things you want in life. If you’re like the way I was, you feel you don’t deserve anything.
If you feel your own father didn’t love you, then how could anyone else? And if your own father didn’t love you, then there must be something really wrong with you!
I admire the way my best friend raised her kids. Her girls feel they can speak their minds without fear of reprisal. They know, no matter what, that their mom and dad will always love them.
If I said some of the things these girls said (and believe me, they are fine, young women) I would incur my father’s wrath. He simply wouldn’t speak to me for months on end. He would ignore me. There could be no challenge, no discussion. I was not worthy to challenge. I just had to accept.
But this is the kind of stuff that makes it difficult to grasp the concepts offered by the Law of Attraction. That we are worthy to have the things we want just because we are here. We don’t have to be rocket scientists or find a cure for cancer. Just because we are living, breathing beings we are worthy to have the kind of life we want.
Tough stuff, as I said, for someone like me.
But the truth is that we do deserve it! No ifs, ands, or buts; success is ours if we want it. You see, the Universe wants us to be happy. To succeed. And the positive energy that surrounds us fans out to envelop others to help make their journey easier as well.
There is joy and beauty all around you. Look for it, and you will see it. It’s true that you find exactly what you’re looking for. See negative and all things negative are there to greet you. But envision the positive, and wonderful things start happening!
Everything has a positive slant. There is good in everything, if you are willing to see it. Just look around. See the oceans, the sky, the stars, the green of the trees, and the beauty of a flower. See the happy little kids playing in a school yard. The birds singing in the sunlight, and all our other animal friends, too. If the Universe can make this happen don’t you think it can help you with your problem also? We’re dealing with an infinite intelligence. I think it can manage to help you out with making your car payment next month.
Open your heart and your mind. You will feel it call you, wanting to help you. Don’t turn it away. It’s been here since the beginning of time waiting just for your call. So make that call today.
"You can read other Law of Attraction articles I have written . . ."